Friday, December 31, 2010

Goodbye, 2010. Adios. Au revoir. Gesundheit. Good night. You weren't very nice to me. I know things could have been worse and I do have my health (now), warmth, food and shelter, but you gave me loneliness, whooping cough, a broken hand and a miscarriage. I'm looking forward to bidding you adieu.

2011? I am welcoming you with open arms and an open heart. You, my lovely year, will be an excellent year. I am excited to see and experience what you will bring. Just a few more hours until you are here.

Until then, I will sit here and enjoy this glass of champagne that, otherwise, would have been (and should still be) forbidden. Cheers.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

One year ago today, a beautiful little girl was born. Happy first birthday, Joslyn Elise! Your aunt and uncle love you so so much. I just wish we all lived closer together so we could see your adorable self grow and learn and play. :)

Saturday, December 18, 2010

The cookie party seemed to turn out well. More updates from a computer, instead of iPhone, later. I'm tired and we are still waking up earlyish to go serve food at the rescue mission tomorrow. I hope they like cookies; they're getting a bunch.

Btw: the blood sugar started the party around 132 and I ended at 94. I spent the entire party snacking on cookies, pizza and junk. Thank goodness for square wave bolusing.

Friday, December 17, 2010

Fun video

Boxer Christmas Movie Quiz 2010 from Boxer Design on Vimeo.



This Video Christmas Card from the UK Firm Boxer has 17 film references in it. How many can you identify?

Answers at http://www.boxercreative.co.uk/christmas/answers.html

Thursday, December 16, 2010

When will the hard days get easier?

Today was a hard day. This holiday season has been hard. I know it could be worse, but it's still hard.

Today, the husband and I went to Target. He left me looking at something while he went to get what we originally went to the store for. When I finished browsing, I walked to where I thought he was looking. I didn't realize I was walking through the baby section until I was halfway in it. That realization caused physical pain. It hurt. I couldn't breathe. I could feel my lungs getting tighter and tighter. I almost had to run out of that section.

Today we also received a belated thank you card from a wedding we went to in July/ August. They told us in September that they were having a baby. We told them December 3 that we were. We then had to tell them that same weekend that we lost our baby. This thank you card had a unnecessary line in it about using our gift (an engraved bottle of liquor) to "toast their little one when it arrives". Is it just me being sensitive or was that a really low blow? They both knew we lost our baby. This card was written after we told them. I feel that line really wasn't necessary to thanking us for our gift. Needless to say, it hurt.

This holiday season has been hard. We were planning on using our gifts and cards this year to tell our family and friends that we were expecting. Now we can't. I just don't feel like going out to the stores to find the remaining gifts for people when I know why I have to do it in the first place. Plus I keep seeing and hearing reminders of what happened. Even my favorite type of music, Christmas Carols, reminds me of what we no longer have. I just have to keep reminding myself that the little newborn baby these songs are singing about is why I am who I am and where I am today. That little baby is the savior who died for my sins.

But, even so, it's tough.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Merci beaucoup

I just wanted to type a quick thank you to everyone who has commented and sent your love and prayers our way. Things are still tough. Not only for me, but for the Timmy as well. This is a horrible thing to have happened, but it has brought us closer together. I know when our time comes to have a baby, we will love and appreciate it even more because of this. I never knew I could love my husband as much as I have found I do recently. Sometimes, it takes a hard time to bring people closer together and to show them how much beauty and love are out there in the world (or at least how much could be out there).

Enough mushy. Just pure thanks. I honestly do appreciate those of you out there who have been there for us.

Friday, December 10, 2010

I feel badly about this. The Timmy bought tickets for the trans-siberian orchestra show tonight for our anniversary gift, but I'm just not feeling it. Christmas music just isn't making the Christmas cheer come back to me this year. Oh well. I'll just sit back and try to enjoy the show and hopefully Timmy won't notice my lack of cheer. Boo... :(

Thursday, December 9, 2010

It seems as though my body must hate me. Not only is all of that action going on "down south", but I also have had this wicked awful cold since Monday. At least I'm taking care of everything at one time. Lol

Side note: my blood sugars have been so freaking good. It's crazy. You'd think that with this stress and all of the comfort food cravings, it'd be super crazy. But no. That's the one thing that's behaving.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Catharsis

What's on Beth's phone Wednesday was skipped last week because the only picture on my phone was still a surprise and it's being skipped this week because of what I have to type right now.

Warning: This may be TMI for some.


July 2011, I was supposed to become a mother. After trying for several months, we were thrilled to finally see a positive test. I was in disbelief that I would be so lucky to have my dreams of a family with my husband come true. I tested with three different brands of pregnancy tests on three different days, each one quickly showing up positive. I was ecstatic. We planned on telling our family Christmas. By then I would have been about 9 weeks pregnant.

Then disaster struck.

We went down to Jacksonville for a friend's wedding that I was in. I was feeling tired and nauseated and all of the usual pregnancy symptoms, but I was still so happy. I drove the 5-6 hours down while the Timmy tried to sleep in the car after his previous night shift at work. He didn't get much sleep in the car, so I left him at the hotel to get a little bit more sleep while I went to the wedding rehearsal. I think he got a total of maybe 3 hours of sleep that day.

When I got back from the rehearsal, we went out and drove around Jax looking for something to eat. After eating, we went back to the hotel where I immediately went to take a shower so I could have my hair dried before the wedding the next morning. It was about 10:30 pm.

The shower began like a shower should; I washed my hair, conditioned it, the usual. Then all of a sudden, I felt warm liquid between my legs. I reached down and, when I pulled my hand away, my hand was covered in bright red blood. Never a good sign. I panicked a bit, but I, for some reason, went ahead and finished the shower. Towards the end of the shower, I checked again. Still a lot of bright red blood.

I went into the hotel room and told the Timmy what was happening. That's when I burst out crying. I knew what was happening. This wasn't the first time. We debated about whether or not we should go to the ER or not. I am so glad we did, even though it will cost us money we didn't expect to spend.

At the ER, they took blood and urine to prove that I, in fact, was pregnant. Those, of course, tested positive. I was also taken for an ultrasound where they checked things out below. She did an external and measured and looked various places. She said that perhaps I wasn't as far along as we believed. She didn't see anything yet. Then she did an internal and that one hurt. She probed and prodded. She then said, again, that I must not be as far as I thought I was. She didn't see anything. I knew then that it must have already passed, but she just told me that the doctor would go over the sonograms when I got back to the room.

Back in the room, we waited forever. It was by then after 3:00 am. Poor Timmy was running on about 3 hours sleep in about 36 hours. I hadn't had much more than that. We still had a wedding to go to in a few hours. By the time the doctor came in, our hope had dwindled to close to nothing. The doctor said that I was "too early" to know whether it was a miscarriage or just a threatened miscarriage. He couldn't see any cells that could be our baby, so he thought it was too early to know. I think he just didn't know and it was late.

I know by my cycles and my HCG levels that I was no earlier than 5 weeks and no later than 7, closer to 7. By that point, you would see something, if not on the external ultrasound, but definitely the internal. We just promised him that I would go get blood drawn when we got back to SC this week to see if the HCG levels were raising as they should in a normal pregnancy or if they had dropped as they would in a miscarriage. I go in tomorrow, but I know what I'll hear.

The pain from cramps and the blood and tissue that have passed since leave no doubt in my mind. It was definitely a miscarriage. At least the hormone levels will give me an idea of how much further I have to go until this is done.

We went to the wedding. We celebrated with the bride and groom. We spent some time with some of the best friends we have. These people will never know how much those simple interactions meant to me on those following days. It helped me have hope for the future. It helped distract me from the pain I was feeling, emotionally and physically. I love my friends.

We also went to our church's healing service that they have the first monday of every month that just so happened to fall on the monday immediately following our miscarriage. We told the pastor our story and shed more tears. He offered some words of wisdom and prayed a prayer for ease of the sadness and a prayer for help from God to accomplish our goal of a family. I was hard for me to go public with that info in person with anybody other than the Timmy, but Talbot (our pastor) made us feel more at ease. I have yet to cry since that service.

The next morning, we received the most beautiful roses from the church with a note that they were thinking of us and praying for us. Again, those meant more to me than they will ever know.


Many more tears have been shed since Friday, and I'm sure there are many more to go, but the Timmy and I are feeling hopeful. We will just keep trying and praying and keeping God as a presence in every aspect of our life. We will be parents someday.

Even though it's still too fresh to talk about in person or over the phone, any prayers and love will be welcomed. Who in their right mind would ever refuse those?

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Game over. For real.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

I need a friend right now more than I ever have needed one before. I'm so lucky to have the Timmy, but I still need a friend.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

New obsession

I found this website recently and I think everyone should check it out. It allows me to travel the globe from the comfort of my own home.

Globe Genie

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

What's on Beth's Phone? Wednesday!

Ello, ol' chaps! Today's photos are brought to you by the number 4.

Ellie likes to watch Glee with me. Normally, she's not allowed on the sofa, but I let her for Glee.

This tree in our front yard was so full and pretty and red. Now? Not so much.


This is the very first pecan pie that I have EVER made. It looks and smells scrumptious. I can't wait to try it, but, alas, I must wait until tomorrow. :(

Monday, November 22, 2010

Diabetes can suck it

I've been having a horrendous weekend, all of it blood sugar related. No matter how many carbs I count, how many carbs I avoid, how many units of insulin I bolus, I can't seem to get my blood sugars down to the level they need to be and also keep them level there. A few days of this and I am thirsty, tired, achy, worn out, frustrated and getting too emotional. If my excellent control (my last a1c was 6.1) doesn't come back soon, my/our hopes and dreams for the future will majorly have problems.

I just did another site change. Hopefully, this one will work out.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

What's on Beth's phone Wednesday!

Time fore another installation on What's On Beth's Phone Wednesday!


We got a couple dozen hot, glazed Krispy Kreme doughnuts for our special one year anniversary dinner. He's a man after my own heart.



I may have found a portal to Narnia....

Monday, November 15, 2010

Yesterday



Yesterday (November 14) was World Diabetes Day. Diabetics, People who love diabetics and different places and monuments celebrated it.


Krispy Kreme said these were for the Panthers, but I'm still saying they were for WDD. :)



I celebrated it, too, in my own way. More on that in a later blog post.

Friday, November 12, 2010

This blog entry is being typed on my iphone because I have the best husband.

I'm spending the weekend at a beautiful bed and breakfast that the Timmy picked out. So far, so good.

It's been a wonderful year with such a wonderful husband. Here's to the next 49 being even better.

Have I ever mention that I love that man very very much? I do.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

The 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month

Today is Veteran's Day. It's not just a day for Active Duty military, Reserves or Veterans to get deals and discounts on meals. It's not a day to take advantage of sales at the stores. It's a day to remember (and thank) those who are and those who have served our country to protect our freedom.

I found the following story on this blog and I knew I had to share it on my blog with whomever out there who chooses to read it.

I Knew You’d Come: A Remembrance Day Recollection

~Author Unknown

He was very old now, but could still hold himself stiffly at attention before the monument. His war, the one to end all wars, now just a fading part of history. Very few could remember, first-hand, the savageness of the ordeal that had sent millions of young men to their deaths. Cannon fodder, they’d called them, sent before the guns to be mown down — blown apart by chunks of metal which had decimated their frail bodies. The cream of a generation; almost wiped out. He was haunted by the faces of the boys he’d had to order into battle, the ones who’d never come back. Yet one nameless ghost was able to bring a measure of comfort to his tormented mind. At the sound of the gun signaling the eleventh hour he was mentally transported back to the fields of Flanders.

::

The battle had raged for over two hours, with neither side gaining any advantage. Wave after wave of soldiers had been dispatched from the muddy trenches and sent over the top. So many had died already that day that he decided he could not afford to lose any more men before reinforcements arrived. Perhaps they’d give the remnants a few more days of life. There came a slight lull in the battle due to the sheer exhaustion of the men on both sides.

During this interval, a young soldier came up to him requesting that he be allowed to go over the top. He looked at the boy who couldn’t have been more than nineteen. Was this extreme bravery in the face of the enemy or was the soldier so scared he just needed to get it over with?

Why would you want to throw your life away, soldier? It’s almost certain death to go out there.”

“My best friend went out over an hour ago, captain, and he hasn’t come back. I know my friend must be hurt and calling for me. I must go to him, sir, I must.” There were tears in the boy’s eyes . It was as if this were the most important thing in the world to him.

“Soldier, I’m sorry, but your friend is probably dead. What purpose would it serve to let you sacrifice your life too?

At least I’d know I’d tried, sir, he’d do the same thing in my shoes. I know he would.

He was about to order the boy back to the ranks, but the impact of his words softened his heart. He remembered the awful pain he’d felt himself when his brother had died. He’d never had the chance to say goodbye.

“All right soldier, you can go.” Despite the horror all around them, he saw a radiant smile on the boy’s face, as if a great weight had been lifted from his shoulders.

“God bless you, sir,” said the soldier.

It was a long time before the guns fell silent for the last time and each side was allowed to gather their dead and wounded. The captain remembered the young soldier. He looked through the many piles of bodies. Young men. So many as to give an unreal quality to the scene before him.

When he came to the makeshift hospital, he looked carefully through the casualties. He soon found himself before the prone body of the soldier, alive, but severely wounded. He knelt down beside the young man and gently laid a hand on his shoulder.

“I’m so sorry, son. I knew I was wrong to let you go.”

“Oh no, sir. I’m glad you did and I’m glad you’re here now so I can thank you. You see sir, I found my friend. He was badly wounded, but I was able to comfort him at the end. As I held him dying in my arms, he looked me in the eyes and said: “I knew you’d come.”

The young soldier faded between consciousness and oblivion for some time before he too finally slipped away.

The captain stayed by his side until the end, tears streaming quietly down his cheeks.

::

As the bugle sounded “Taps”, the old captain envisioned once again the young soldier’s face. Looking up, he could almost hear the stone monument calling out to him: “I knew you’d come.”


I know so many people who I would love to thank for what they have done and what they do every day. To my grandfather, both of my brothers, friends, family and even my lovely husband I'd like to say thank you. Thank you for the sacrifices you have made. I wish people would thank you all every day, not just holidays like veterans day, memorial day or the fourth of July. You deserve it.


Wednesday, November 10, 2010

What's on Beth's Phone ? Wednesdays!

"What's on Beth's Phone? Wednesdays" is going to be a weekly installment where I post a picture or two (or twenty) that I have snapped on my phone in the past week.

Hopefully, this will get me started taking pictures again. I used to love photography. In fact, I have had a couple of pictures in juried art shows before. Perhaps I can do better this go around and earn that million dollars that the Timmy says I'm going to make us someday. :)

Well, enough chit chat. Here's this week's photos!


I didn't know our dog Ellie had her own beer!



It's beginning to look a lot like fallllllllll, everywhere you go.




I love fun graffiti like this building had.

The following weeks will probably have less, but who really knows. I'll try to keep the images to a minimum, I suppose.

One last picture:


I still want to pull it.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

We need a cure...

I want a cure for Type 1, insulin dependent, "Juvenile" Diabetes. Not for me, but for all of the kids out there who get diagnosed every day. They deserve to grow up like all of the other kids out there.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Why...

Why do things have to keep hurting me like this??? Why cant I get over it and remember that God is in charge?

One more thing, today, to remind me of what I am not yet able to accomplish.

Monday, October 25, 2010

formspring.me

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/bethenasia

What's your favorite drink?

My favorite drink would have to be iced flavored coffee. I usually prefer caramel. Yummmmmm!

Ask me anything

Monday, October 18, 2010

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Operation Christmas Child

Watch this video and consider filling a shoebox or two or twenty.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Day Thirty of 30 Days of Me

In this past month, what have you learned?

I've learned how to survive September 2010. That about sums it up.

Friday, October 1, 2010

Day Twenty-Nine of 30 Days of Me

Your favorite song




Vivaldi's Concerto in G

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Day Twenty-Eight of 30 Days of Me

A picture of you from last year and now, how have you changed since then?

Bridal Shower 09/2009



Mountain visit 06/2010


Not much has changed since last year. I'm married and we live in our own house now. That's good. But other than that... Not much.

Perhaps next year.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Day Twenty-Seven of 30 Days of Me

Why are you doing this 30 day challenge

I started this 30 day "challenge" to give me some ideas of things to blog about. I may do another one soon.

Or maybe not. What do you think I should do?

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Day Twenty-Six of 30 Days of Me

What do you think about your friends

By golly! I think they are quite swell!

Monday, September 27, 2010

Day Twenty-Five of 30 Days of Me

What I would find in your bag

Coming soon

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Day Twenty-Four of 30 Days of Me

A letter to your parents

Coming soon

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Day Twenty-Three of 30 Days of Me

Something you crave for a lot

Sushi. I love love love sushi. I could eat it every stinkin' day. Yummmmmmm!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Day Twenty-Two of 30 Days of Me

What makes you different from everyone else

I am different than everyone else because of my heart and soul. Ha! Got you there. :)

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Day Twenty-one of 30 Days of Me

A picture of something that makes you happy





Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Day Twenty of 30 Days of Me

Someone you see yourself marrying or being with in the future


I already married him. :)

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Day Nineteen of 30 Days of Me

Nicknames you have and why you have them

Bethel, Bethany, Bef (Most little kids call me this), Buff (When my cousin was younger, this is how he said Beth. The name kinda stuck), Jo ("I knew you were one of those 'Little Women' "), Beth

Monday, September 20, 2010

Day Eighteen of 30 Days of Me

Plans/dreams/goals you have

This one is simple. I hope to become the best wife and mother I can be. My dreams include celebrating a 50th wedding anniversary with the wonderful Timmy. I also dream of becoming a mother. Our kids will be pretty stinkin cute. :)


We can all learn something from these if we just open our eyes and hearts.



OK Go - White Knuckles - Official Video

I love love love this. IKEA? Dogs? Perfect!

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Day Seventeen of 30 Days of Me

Someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why

I would be interested in switching live with anyone for a day. I think it would help me develop an appreciation for the life I do have, no matter how easy or hard I may believe I have it.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

I'm really thinking that I'm turning invisible. Literally.

Day Sixteen of 30 Days of Me

Another picture of yourself


Well, it is technically me. It's just not of my face. Ha ha.

Friday, September 17, 2010

Day Fifteen of 30 Days of Me

Put you ipod on shuffle: first 10 songs that play

I included links to the songs on youtube for your viewing pleasure.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Day Fourteen of 30 Days of Me


A picture of you and your family








This last one was a reflection of me and the Timmy on the Bean in Chicago.


Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Day Thirteen of 30 Days of Me

A letter to someone who has hurt you recently

Dear ____, You don't know that you've hurt me. You wouldn't know why you would have, even if you knew. But you did, and you have.

I can't bear reading about what is going on. It's
too new. It's too fresh. You don't have any reason not to write about it. So go ahead. I just won't be reading it.

I will avoid any accidental readings about it until further notice. I will stay away from it until I can handle it better. That day will come, eventually, but I don't know when.

You keep on smiling and writing about everything. You deserve this. I'm not going to deny that.

I'm just not ready to read it.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Day Twelve of 30 Days of Me

How you found out about blogger and why you have one

I've known about blogger for what seems like forever. I just never had one because I was able to use other social media sites for the same reason. But, as more and more people use such sites (i.e. facebook), I've felt that I can't really express myself. That's how my blog was formed.

Occasionally, I even feel hindered on here. I want to vent certain thoughts and feelings, but I am worried that they will be talked about behind my back amongst people that should just talk straight to me. Or, likewise, people will start incessantly harassing me about things I wrote on here. That's why I quit livejournal and myspace. That's not quite why I'm avoiding facebook right now, but I still feel that way on there from some people.

So, a question/favor for whomever is reading this blog: If you know me in real life and I write something on here, will you just keep it pretty much to yourself? You can (privately) ask me about it, but not too much. Please? Things are about to get crazy around here and I know I'll need a place to share my inner joys and struggles.

Monday, September 13, 2010

Day Eleven of 30 Days of Me

Another picture of you and your friends



All of my most recent pictures of me and my friends are from my wedding, almost a year ago. Like I've previously said, Charlotte hasn't shown me any good friends yet and it's been way too long since I've seen the ones truest to me. I miss them.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Day Ten of 30 Days of Me

Songs you listen to when you are happy, sad, bored, hyper, mad

When I'm happy, I like upbeat, funny songs.

When I'm sad, anything kinda about what I'm sad about. Those songs seem to make me cry and, when I'm sad,
I need help crying or else I hole it up inside and end up exploding in a not so ladylike way.

When I'm bored, all music tends to make me feel even antsier. Weird, I know.

When I'm hyper, I don't sit still and pay attention to music for certain songs to make a difference.

When I'm mad, I like songs that just sound angry. Well, those or classical.


Saturday, September 11, 2010

Day Nine of 30 Days of Me

Something you're proud of in the past few days

Not much of what I've done or felt in the past few days is something to be proud of. Instead of sharing joy with someone, I am keeping myself away from them. My thoughts on this subject have not been the kindest and I regret that.

But a couple of good
things that is coming from this is I shared my feelings with my husband and that, in turn, is making me feel closer to him. Another thing it is helping me with is my relationship with God. Every time I think negatively about it, I just say a quick prayer to God asking Him to give me strength to get through this.

You know what? He has.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Day Eight of 30 Days of Me

Short term goals for this month and why

1. Finish Jenn's garters. I am 90% done with them.
2. Wrap up plans for Jenn's Bridal Shower that will, hopefully, be next month.
3. Sew a baby blanket for a baby boy, due in November.

I don't think I really need to explain why for those goals.Pretty self-explanatory. Except for...

4. Heal my bones. I fell last night. I fell and landed improperly. Apparently, it is a bad idea to step in to a bath when you have put lotion on your feet not that much earlier. A bad, bad idea.

I fell. My arm broke my fall. I broke my hand, near my thumb. I have a cast on for two weeks. If I am lucky, it'll come off September 28. Pictures of the casted arm later.


On a better note, can anyone draw a shark? I have a long distance request for a shark to be drawn on my cast.


Thursday, September 9, 2010

Day Seven of 30 Days of Me

A picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Day Six of 30 Days of Me

Favorite super hero and why

Harry Potter! Come on; He fights Voldemort and wins! He has magical powers and I am a meer Muggle.

Yes. I know I am a nerd for picky HP for my favorite Super Hero, but I am what I am. :)



On another not related, yet somewhat related note:

This little girl is turning 11 today! I still find it somewhat hard to believe. This is the little girl that called me Bef and called other girls that came into her home 'Bef". This is the little girl that passed as my child so I could get in to Dave & Busters. This is one of the strongest preteens I know out there. I look up to everything that she has overcome and I will always view her as my little sister. I love this kiddo. Happy Birthday, Sarah!





L'Shana Tova - Happy Rosh Hashanah, שנה טובה

A meme for Wilford Brimley

Finally, a blog meme just for those of us with wonky pancreases (and for the people who love us). If you're in the mood for meme'ing today, have at it!

What type of diabetes do you have: Type 1 (aka Juvenile Diabetes.... Those 'juveniles' grow up and are still diabetic. JDRF for a cure!)

When were you diagnosed: January 1996

What's your current blood sugar: 96

What kind of meter do you use: One Touch Mini

How many times a day do you test your blood sugar: Minimum 5 times

What's a "high" number for you: Anything over 200 mg/dl.

What's do you consider "low": Anything under 70 mg/dl.

What's your favorite low blood sugar reaction treater: I usually have those juicy juices for toddlers or glucose tablets, but I do have a weakness for dark chocolate.

Describe your dream endo: Compassionate, attentive, non-judgmental about my bad diabetic past, and part of my insurance network.

What's your biggest diabetes achievement: Getting my A1c down to 7, and that was with having pertussis. I'm looking forward to this next time. :)

What's your biggest diabetes-related fear: Going blind

Who's on your support team: My husband, my mom and my Izzie-roo

Do you think there will be a cure in your lifetime: Perhaps. I really hope so. There are too many little tiny children out there being diagnosed every day. I just want them to know a future with freedom and without pokes and lows and constant doctors and needles and threats.

What is a "cure" to you: Something that makes a type 1 diabetic like a normal non-diabetic, not into (basically) a type 2.

The most annoying thing people say to you about your diabetes is: "Should you be eating [fill in the blank]?" I know they are only trying to help, but I have been with the D for almost 15 years. I have an insulin pump. I have a brain. Let me decide, not the info you were given about your great aunt's cousin's friend.

What is the most common misconception about diabetes: That an insulin pump is a cure. Or that the advances in diabetic research for Type 2 will cure type 1s. Or that I "ate too much sugar" and that's why I have diabetes. Yeah. That last one really gets to me.

If you could say one thing to your pancreas, what would it be: Bum.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Day Five of 30 Days of Me

A picture of somewhere you've been to

Chicago July/August 2010

Monday, September 6, 2010

Day Four of 30 Days of Me

A habit that you wish you didn’t have

Procrastination. I wish I would just do something once I think about it, instead of putting it off because "I can just do that later".

On that note, I wish I would actually finish things that I start. :)

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Day Three of 30 Days of Me

A picture of you and your friends

This is me and my best friend on my wedding day. :)

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Day Two of 30 Days of Me

The meaning behind your blog name

My blog name is The Beth Chronicles. My name is Beth and this blog somewhat chronicles my life. I suppose that makes sense, eh? ;)

Friday, September 3, 2010

Day One of 30 days of me

Recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself


1. The name? It's Elisabeth with an S. Get it right.

2. I'm not normally that rude, but I'm tired of my name alllllways being misspelled.

3. I'm actually pretty shy, but you wouldn't know it if you've known me for a while. I have to give myself mini pep talks before doing new things and meeting new people.

4. Because of #3, I don't have any local friends right now, no matter how friendly I try to be.

5. I miss my friends from GA and FL more than they have any idea about.

6. I have Type 1 (aka Juvenile) Diabetes. No, I didn't get it because I "ate too much sweets".

7. Despite the diabeetus, I love to bake and I'm not to shabby at it either.

8. The Sundays I volunteer in the nursery at my church are the happiest and most fulfilled days of my month.

9. My dog may be little, but she's mighty.


10. I'm just learning how to sew, but I've caught on pretty fast.

11. I get distracted easil...

12. Sushi and Coffee and my faaaavorite two food/beverages.

13. I'd like to think I am an artist, but I'm not sure I have that much talent.

14. I still need to learn how to ride a bike. My husband is out riding his as I type.

15. Now that this is complete, I get to go play The Sims 3 Ambitions that I just got in the mail today. Yes. I know I'm a nerd. :)

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Coming soon to a blog near you

30 days of me:

day 1- recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself
day 2- the meaning behind you blog name
day 3- a picture of you and your friends
day 4- a habit that you wish you didn’t have
day 5- a picture of somewhere you've been to
day 6- favorite super hero and why
day 7- a picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you
day 8- short term goals for this month and why
day 9- something you re proud of in the past few days
day 10- songs you listen to when you are happy, sad, bored, hyped, mad
day 11- another picture of you and your friends
day 12- how you found out about blogger and why you have one
day 13- a letter to someone who has hurt you recently
day 14- a picture of you and your family
day 15- put you ipod on shuffle: first 10 songs that play
day 16- another picture of yourself
day 17- someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why
day 18- plans/dreams/goals you have
day 19- nicknames you have and why you have them
day 20- someone you see yourself marrying or being with in the future
day 21- a picture of something that makes you happy
day 22- what makes you different from everyone else
day 23- something you crave for a lot
day 24- a letter to your parents
day 25- what I would find in your bag
day 26- what do you think about your friends
day 27- why are you doing this 30 day challenge
day 28- a picture of you from last year and now, how have you changed since then?
day 29- you favorite song
day 30- in this past month, what have you learned
I'm thinking I need to find a mouse....

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

You need to know it, I understand

1. High heels or boots? Flippy floppies

2. What time did you get up this morning? Late

3. What was the last movie you saw at the theater? Despicable Me in 3D. Cute!

4. What is your maiden name? Arper-Hay

5. What is your favorite TV show? Ummm... GLEEEEEEEEEEEEE

6. What do you usually have for breakfast? Whatever I can eat quickly. Bleck.

7. What is your middle name? Lynn

8. What food do you dislike? Corn. And blue foods.

9. What is your favorite CD at the moment? I don't think I have one.

10. What characteristic do you despise? Ignorance

11. Favorite clothing? Skirts

12. Anywhere in the world on vacation? France, Australia, New York. That order.

13. Are you an organized person? Define organized.....

14. Where would you retire to? Retire from what?

15. What was your most recent memorable birthday? My most recent birthday I turned 26, but the most memorable one would have to be my 24th. I just happened to meet this really awesome guy...

16. What are you going to do when you finish this? See if the husband is tired of playing video games yet.

17. Furthest place you have ever been to? Europe

18. Person you wish you could meet? I wish I could meet my current friends who live too far away. A cup of coffee or two would be nice.

19. When is your birthday? Six two

20. Are you a morning person or a night person? Night. Do not, I repeat, do NOT expect much from me in the morning.

21. What is your shoe size? 7.5-8.5

22. Do you own any animals? Isabella Chacharita and Shizelle Noelle

23. Any news you'd like to share? Sure.

24. When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? An artist

25. What is your favorite flower? Daffodils

26. What would you currently like to be when you grow up? Happy

{For some reason, question #27 is missing…not sure why, so I'll create my own}
27. What color are your toenails? Red, of course. What a silly question!

28. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Golden yellow

29. How is the weather right now? Hot

30. Last person you spoke to on the phone? The Timmy

31. Favorite drink? Right now? Tea, I suppose

32. Favorite restaurant? Liu lius and Outback

33. Hair color? Depends on the box

34. What was your favorite toy as a child? Ja-joes (GI Joes), My little pony, strawberry shortcake dolls ( the old ones that were small, plastic choking hazards that smelled like fruit, not the demented looking ones they have today, with those odd over sized heads.)

35. Spring, summer, fall, or winter? Spring!

36. Chocolate or vanilla? Caramel

37. Coffee or tea? Coooooooffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

38. Wish you were still young? Never. I like where I am.

39. Do you want to get married? Been there, done that. One of my life's happiest days. :)

40. When was the last time you cried? Tears coming to my eyes? A few minutes ago, when I found out a friend's mother had died. Embarrassing, turn my nose and eyes red kind? A church, when they played "How Great Thou Art". Happens every time...

41. What is under your bed? Dust

42. What did you do last night? I played Mario Kart Wii with the most awesome soon-to-be 11 year old ever. I love that kid.

43. What are you afraid of? The unknown.

44. Salty or sweet? Salty

45. Describe yourself in 10 words. Eventful Loud Interesting Special Artsy-fartsy Brainy Entertaining Thankful Happy Married

46. How many years at your current job? What job? Living? 26-ish years. I do a good job at it too.

47. Favorite day of the week? Sunday

48. Favorite movie? One of many: Funny Face

49. Do you have a crush on anyone? My husband

50. Do you like finding out all this stuff about your friends? I'm nosy. Of course.



If you read this, please fill one out. If you have a blog, do it there. If not, do it on facebook as a note and tag me. I want to read it. :)

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Being alone

Being alone can stink, but I suppose it's not always so bad....

But still. I wish my friends didn't live so far away.



Sunday, August 8, 2010

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Steel Magnolias? You suck.

The Timmy and I went to his good friend Scott's wedding this past weekend in Chicago. Generally, I love weddings. It's the perfect time to celebrate your love , whether you are the couple getting married or not. Everyone is happy. The bride for marrying her love. The groom for marrying his love. The bridal party and the guests for being there to witness a loved one joining in marriage with someone they really love. The bride and groom's parents for watching their dear child get married to their love and the future parent of their grandchildren. And that is all I kept hearing this weekend about them and their future babies.

"When are you going to give me grandchildren?"

"You two need to start working on getting me a grandchild."

"When are you guys going to get my child a playmate?"

"We're counting down the time until we hear that you two are going to have a baby."

"We can't wait... [blah, blah, blah]"

All I can think of is how our potential future babies have seemed to become a taboo topic. Parents aren't encouraging it. Siblings aren't harassing about it. Friends don't really push it on us. Is it because I am a type 1 diabetic? Do they think a pregnancy for me will end in disaster? It won't. And that is why the post's title is such. That movie has given everyone the wrong idea about diabetes. Yes, it's hard, but, no, it's not impossible nor frowned upon. It just means that we need to be prepared and be in control.

I guess I am just a bit jealous that people didn't and don't just assume that that is the next step for us. I'm not saying it is, but it could be and I would have kinda liked that to have been recognized with us like it was this past weekend with Scott and Jill.

Am I just jealous and that's what this is all about? I don't think that's it. I've just had a couple of things happen on the same day this past weekend that got me thinking. I just wish those who "accidentally" get pregnant or who can easily get pregnant without complications would realize how lucky they are and that the little baby they now have or will have soon is not a pawn in a game. So many others would just love an easy little miracle like that.



A side note: The wedding was absolutely beautiful and my husband was smoking hot in his tux. ;)

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Power of prayers

Strong little Daisy Merrick and her family

Daisy from Reality on Vimeo.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

I have never felt more alone than I do now.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

My day four update will have to be in the morning. Je suis fatigue. Sorry.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

My biggest supporter(s)

... and I'm not talking about my bra here. It's day three (plus a month or so) of Diabetes Blog Week and this is about my biggest supporter when it comes to diabetes care. And I have several.

When I was diagnosed until even now at times, my biggest supporter was most definitely my wonderful mother. She was the one who made sure I had medicine and food and she was the one to drive me to the hospital the few times I've had to go. This woman was the one who took of work when I was in high school to drive to my school when I wouldn't (couldn't) leave for lunch, due to low blood sugar. That was the time I was so out of it that I hit her, scratched her, spit juice/soda all over her, etc. She ignored that nastiness because she knew I needed her and I needed the sugar she was trying to give me. My mother has given me life more times than I can count.



My current biggest supporter would be my adorable husband. Timmy knows what I am feeling before I can even tell him. He will jump up and grab whatever I need to help raise low blood sugars. He stays awake with me when my blood sugar drops at night to make sure I am safe, even when he has to wake up at 4 or 5 am. He's the one who loves me when I'm crabby and when I'm weak. He loves me when I'm high and low and all that's in between. I am certainly lucky that I have him.

My biggest four legged supporter is Izzie, my CGMS (Chorkie Glucose Monitoring System). She barks to wake me up in the middle of the night to alert me to low blood sugars, then continues to bark until the Timmy wakes up. If I'm low, she follows me until she knows I am safe. If I'm high, she'll sit and stare at me until help arrives. She is my best friend and I am hers.


Doesn't she look good in a sombrero? :)

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Going low

Day two of last month's Diabetes Blog Week: Making the low go

I hate low blood sugar. Hate hate hate it. And, unfortunately, I have been experiencing it on a semi-regular basis recently. When it hits me, it can hit hard. Seeing numbers in the 40's or 50's isn't so unusual for me and one day recently, I hit 29. Yikes! :(

I keep snacks in my purse at all times and I always have trusty glucose tablets. They may have a nasty chalky taste (If you ever meet me, ask and I'll let you try one), but they get the job done quickly. I also try to keep juice boxes made for toddlers around. They have the perfect amount of carbs to raise that low.

Of course, this doesn't mean I'll refuse a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup or a Crunchie. I love those things. :)

Sunday, June 20, 2010

A day in the life of this diabetic

In fact, this is a mixed and mashed together bits of several actual days to start my month late participation in Diabetes blog week.

I woke up with blood sugar a little high. Extra insulin needed! Oh boy! This is not what I need today. I'm running late and will be sitting in a class for several hours. High blood sugar and the accompanying extreme thirst and frequent urination will NOT do. I'll just skip ahead to the insulin pump site change.

Dressed, fed and site change done, we walk out of the door. As I get in the car, my purse gets snagged on the seat and hits my stomach and a sharp pain rips my skin. Shoot. The new site got ripped out by my purse hitting my stomach for a split second. I run inside to change the site again. As I lift my shirt, I see blood running down from where my site just got ripped from my stomach. Great. I apply pressure to the bleeding spot as I change the new site to a newer site. Luckily, I add in cushion time when I have to be somewhere. We arrived right on time and my blood sugar stabilized.

Later, I start to feel funny in the class. I feel weak. I feel tingly. My brain starts to feel foggy. I can't focus on what the pastor is saying. I motion to the Timmy that I feel off and I need to test.

I test right there in my seat in the middle of the class's circle of chairs. 45. Not good. I show Timmy and he gets up and grabs me something to eat from the snack table and I pop a couple of glucose tablets into my mouth. Within a few minutes, I feel better. No one else seemed to notice our mini emergency as we took care of it. I don't know if I should be proud of my stealth mode of handling things or if I should be worried that I don't let people know I am in need of help. Thank goodness for my Timmy.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

A month late, but that's ok

I'll be starting this next week.

Better late than never.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

The big 2-6 on 6-2. :)

Hollah!

Thursday, May 6, 2010

#52


I crocheted the baby blanket for my tiny baby niece Joslyn. I hope her parents will let her play with it and ruin it with love someday. :)

On to Texas!

After finding out something quite special at the end of our Oklahoma part of the trip, the Timmy and I drove on to Dallas.

This is what we saw a lot of:


Flat land....

Oil rigs.....

And COWS!


Finally, we made it to Texas.



Where I got to see this cutie, our niece Lauren.


Our trip was short, but fun. I can't wait to see all of the people and babies again. Perhaps next time won't be as long apart as it was this last time.

Monday, May 3, 2010

Getting busy...

Life is getting pretty busy. This poor blog is suffering. :( It doesn't help that I feel tired these days more than I used to (even though I won't admit that I am tired to Timmy). Perhaps I'm getting sick... Oh well. On with the blog!

We went to Oklahoma last weekend in April. I had a blast seeing family and meeting adorable little babies. Oh and COWS!


Timmy and Lucian: Two boys with a love for video games


Of course we went to the memorial in OKC. Little chairs in memory of the littlest victims. :(


Timmy likes to eat babies. Poor Joslyn.


I love this chubby baby picture and I love this cute baby!


My next blog will be about the rest of our trip. Texas, here we come!

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Tomorrow... I'll do it tomorrow....

I haven't updated in quite a while, but don't you kittens fret. I have a nice post for you tomorrow.

Just you wait and see. :)

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Waiting.....

Have I ever mentioned how much i hate waiting? Well, I do. And that's all I can do right now.

I'll be here, waiting.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Whoa whoa whoa! Slow down!

The Timmy fell down the hill yesterday. I feel a poem coming on:

Ellie and Timmy went up a hill
to force a dog to poo.
Ellie took off after a dog to play
causing Timmy to trip on his shoe.

Down the Timmy went
and he heard a loud POP!
That stupid dog Ellie
Well, she didn't stop.

"Is my foot broken?"
the Timmy asked.
"I don't want to ruin her visit
with my foot in a cast."

To the emergency room
we went.
The ankle? Just sprained.
We left with a splint.


Bad dogs= Sprained ankles. My poor Timmy.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

I got some news!

I just found out a bunch of excellent news!

I purchased a Powerball lottery ticket for last night's drawing.... and won! I won $81 million dollars! Please please please don't tell the Timmy. We plan on leaving him now that I have this money and move to France. Yes, we. Me and my unborn children. I didn't tell you guys I'm pregnant with twins? Oops. I thought it'd be best not to. You see, the Timmy and I are not quite sure who the father is.

Well, anyways, I'll be quitting my job and moving as soon as the money comes in. I have one last thing to say to you guys: April Fools!

WHAT!?!

Yes. Everything above is a joke. I didn't win the lottery. Heck. I don't even play. I would NEVER leave the Timmy nor would I ever cheat on him. We are still very, very much in love and nothing could change that. I am not quitting my job and moving to France, even though I'd love to one day. And, last but not least, I am NOT pregnant, especially not with twins. But I do know someone who is!

So, to confirm, no lottery, no divorcing, no twins, no quitting. Got it? Good. I just had to make sure. :)

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

#52


52. Crochet a baby blanket

It's coming along quite well. I hope the baby that will be getting this will love it. Or at least the parents won't think it's hideous. It is my first crocheting project. Ever.

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Yay!

I've had a completely low BS day! Here's to another one tomorrow!


I gotta keep it up if I am to achieve my goals. :)

Friday, March 26, 2010

These middle of the night low blood sugars just make me want to cry. In fact, after a reading of 56 a few minutes ago, I did.

When will these sudden lows get better? :(

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Some math

9x - 7i > 3 (3x-7u)


Solve for i

#76


76. Participate in Operation Beautiful 5 times. (1/5)

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Diabetes is strange.

Today, I have been eating like crazy, due to the mega fun Spring Fling in Baxter. Pasta, footlong subs, cider beers, chips, pineapple upside down cake... Pure junk. Pure, carb filled junk and my blood sugar hasn't gone above 97. I am amazed.

Mostly because, the other day, I only ate pretzels and a babybel cheese and my blood sugar didn't hardly go under 200. Not good, I know, but all of these blood sugar variations are bs.

The Timmy says it's like I'm "riding a roller coaster". I think I'd like to get off now.

Friday, March 19, 2010

40 bags in 40 days Challenge

40 bags in 40 days started as a challenge for Lent, but I decided to modify it for me and my tastes. The purpose is to rid your life of clutter. You can use any size bag from baggies to large leaf bags, but you have to fill one every day. It can be a trash bag full of trash that you toss or a grocery bag with a few clothes for Goodwill or whatever you want. You just do it every day for 40 days.

It started this earlier this week. Day one was a bag of items I needed to mail off. Day two was a bag of trash. Day three was a sack of past issues of Cosmos and Real Simples to a friend. Day four was a bit of a cheat- I ate some leftovers, emptying two baggies. That counts, right?

Day five is today and I have yet to fill a bag. I need to get on this!
Have I ever mentioned how much I dislike working the overnight shifts? I do. Thankfully, I have but an hour left.

And today is the Timmy's birthday. I hope it's special, like him.

Monday, March 15, 2010

My new 101 in 1001 list

After seeing the 101 in 1001 challenge on several blogs, I was inspired to jump right in. I'll cross off the tasks as they are completed and blog about them along the way. Wish me luck!


The Mission: Complete 101 preset tasks in a period of 1001 days.

The Criteria: Tasks must be specific (ie. no ambiguity in the wording) with a result that is either measurable or clearly defined. Tasks must also be realistic and stretching (ie. represent some amount of work on my part).

Why 1001 Days? Many people have created lists in the past - frequently simple goals such as New Year's resolutions. The key to beating procrastination is to set a deadline that is realistic. 1001 Days (about 2.75 years) is a better period of time than a year, because it allows you several seasons to complete the tasks, which is better for organizing and timing some tasks such as overseas trips or outdoor activities.


Start Date: March 18, 2010

End Date: December 13, 2012


My to-do list in no particular order…


29/101 Done


1. Work out 3-4 days/week.

2. Pay for the person behind me in the drive-thru

3. Submit art to nationally published magazine

4. Call my grandmother at least once a month for a year

5. Visit Chicago

6. Go camping

7. Go to New York City

8. See a show on Broadway

9. Go to a wine tasting

10. Renew my CPR certification.

11. Go a month without buying any clothes

12. Fill at least one book-bound journal every 3 months for 1 year.

13. Learn to apply eyeliner so that it doesn't look like crap.

14. Decorate the blank living room wall.

15. Find 2 chairs for the living room. 1 down, 1 to go

16. Write letters to 5 friends telling them what I like about them

17. Baby-sit for a toddler or younger for at least an evening.

18. Eat at home every meal for a week

19. Launch a website.

20. Take a picture to sum up the month every month for a year

21. Learn to drive stick

22. Try 8 new recipes. (8/8)

23. Throw a baby/bridal shower for a friend

24. Attend 4 musicals or plays. (0/4)

25. Take a day trip to Columbia

26. Attend at least 1 concert. WinterJam

27. Send 10 cards to friends just because. (4/10)

28. Send 10 cards to family members just because. (2/10)

29. Go somewhere new I went to see family in Oklahoma

30. Go somewhere familiar and pretend to be a tourist

31. Make something in our wok.

32. Go on a vacation.

33. Read 20 books. (20/20)

34. Go on a picnic.

35. Visit the zoo.

36. Visit a museum or art gallery.

37. Do something nice for Timmy 10 times. (10/10)

38. Play mini golf.

39. Try 10 new restaurants. (10/10)

40. Do something that I’m proud of.

41. Make a list of 25 things I like about myself

42. Get a facial.

43. Learn to juggle

44. Write a message with Chalk in a public place

45. Watch a movie starting with each letter of the alphabet. (0/26)

46. "Unplug" from the TV, computer and cell phone for 1 day.

47. Get Patio furniture

48. Have dinner outside.

49. Take a picture of what makes each season special

50. Put all spare change somewhere and not touch it until the end

51. Clear out computer clutter/delete old files.

52. Crochet a baby blanket I made one for baby Joslyn.

53. Do something I’ve never done before. I tried an inversion table at Dick's Sporting Goods. Weird.

54. Donate to Goodwill I'm moving. Does that explain things?

55. Take 20 pictures of things that make me happy. (5/20)

56. Have dinner by candlelight

57. Be agreeable for one day

58. Paint on canvas.

59. Take a creative class of some sort.

60. Send a secret to PostSecret.

61. Learn to ride a bike

62. Write a letter to myself to open in 10 years

63. Go to a piano bar.

64. Make a wedding album.

65. Take a bubble bath.

66. Tie a note to a balloon and let it go

67. Carve my name on a tree

68. Color an entire coloring book

69. Find 10 things to love about living in Charlotte/ South Carolina. (1/10)

70. Find out my blood type

71. Attend a Knights game.

72. Attend a Checkers game

73. Forgive those things I may still be hanging on to

74. Write all my bad memories on paper, burn paper afterwards

75. Get a library card

76. Participate in Operation Beautiful 5 times. (1/5)

77. Participate in d365

78. Watch 5 of Timmy’s favorite movies that I haven’t already seen. (3/5)

79. Paint pottery.

80. Use reusable grocery bags at least 15 times. (0/15)

81. Do something nice for my mom.

82. Visit a new state OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOklahoma!

83. Read the entire bible

84. Buy 5 things on Etsy. (1/5)

85. Learn a new craft. I learned how to crochet.

86. Join a book club

87. Participate in 40 bags in 40 days

88. Visit somewhere that requires a passport.

89. Do research on Adoption

90. Keep tight control for future babies :)

91. Pay off debt

92. Lose some weight

93. Go to a wine festival.

94. Compliment a stranger.

95. Get together with an old friend that I haven’t seen in over a year.

96. Eat dinner at home for a week

97. Bake my own bread

98. Print and frame a photo that I took.

99. Host a game night

100. Inspire someone else to do a 101 in 1001 list

101. Donate $5 to the JDRF for every task not complete.


If you can help with any, please let me know!